Soo stressed ...
so tense...
so closed off to the world ..
that my brain hurts...my teeth hurt..
i feel like i can trust no one with the burdens of my anxiety..
i cant lay my burdens down on anyone...
i dont want to infect them with the malaise that hangs over me like a cloud...

in every area..
there is uncertainty and doubt and disappointment...
pressure to perform and produce..
no respite in sight...
34 has not been a good year for me so far...
i had such great hopes for it..
i pray its a transitional thing..
i see only upheaval coming in the next couple months..
i pray i have the strength to deal with it...

i rely on me...and my abilities...
theyve done me well in the past...
i hope they continue to in this uncertain future..